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Oscars: Ke Huy Quan, Michelle Yeoh and more win big, but their moms were the biggest winners

Laura Trujillo   | Paste BN
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Moms never do anything for a thank you. We do it out of love.

There is a lifetime of knowing whose white jersey needs to be clean for the home games, and which day play practice ends early, and remembering that the kid who ate a turkey sandwich every day for a year decided on Tuesday that she no longer likes it.

The thank you comes when you see your kid happy or learn a lesson on their own, choose their own path and find people they love. The thank you comes in seeing them live their lives.

So watching the Academy Awards on Sunday, I loved seeing everyone who earned Oscars, but the real winners seemed to be the moms. During the 95th annual show, the gratitude was all theirs.

They were the darlings of the acceptance speeches.

When Ke Huy Quan heard his name called for best supporting actor at the Oscars, the first image that popped into his head was his mom.

Quan told reporters backstage that the moment was made even more special because presenter Ariana DeBose said his full birth name when announcing the award. Quan changed his name years ago to one that was Americanized when he was struggling to find acting work.

“That was a really, really special moment for me. I was so emotional but the first image that I had in my mind was my mom, who is the reason why I am in America, who is the reason why I have a better life, the reason why I have all these opportunities.”

He then started to cry and raised his eyes and his Oscars to the ceiling.

As he accepted his award during the telecast, the actor from “Everything Everywhere All At Once,” said: "My mom is 84 years old and she's at home watching. Mom, I just won an Oscar! … Thank you to my mom for the sacrifices she made to get me here.”

And it’s true. As moms, we try to make sure our children don’t encounter the same challenges we do. We went through it so they won’t have to. My kids say that for as long as they can remember, I have said: I just want you to be healthy, happy and independent.

I love that they know that. It is true. I don’t want a thank you. I want to see them be who they want to be, on their own schedule, and in their own way.

When Daniel Scheinart won best director with Daniel Kwan for "Everything Everywhere All at Once," he didn’t just recognize his own mom, but said: “This one is dedicated to the mommies of the world, to our moms, specifically my mom and dad, thank you for not squashing my creativity when I was making really disturbing horror films or really perverted comedy films or dressing in drag as a kid, which is a threat to nobody.”

It was a sweet moment, and made me think of the way we encourage our children. We don’t judge their work but ask them to tell us about it. Some will nurture that love into a career. Other kids will just feel the impossible love we feel for them.

The joy in motherhood comes as they grow. When asked what my favorite age was for my children, my answer always seemed to be whatever stage they were then. They keep getting more interesting, and I keep reminding myself how lucky I am to be their mom.

Costume designer Ruth E. Carter became the first Black woman to win two Oscars. "This is for my mother. She was 101," Carter said of her award for "Black Panther: Wakanda Forever."

Backstage, she said: “I had a great relationship with her in her final years. The same relationship I always had with her. I was her ride-or-die. I was her road dog. I was her sidekick. I know she’s proud of me. I know that she wanted this for me as much as I wanted it for myself.”

Michelle Yeoh, who won an Oscar for best actress, thanked her family. “I have to dedicate this to my mom, all the moms in the world, because they are really the superheroes and without them, none of us would be here tonight. She’s 84 and I’m taking this home to her. She’s watching right now in Malaysia, KL, with my family and friends. I love you guys, I’m bringing this home to you.”

Backstage, she told reporters “My mother has always instilled in me confidence, taught me about love, taught me about kindness and compassion. I’m not very good at this at times.”

And, of course, while moms aren’t asking for thank yous, they never leave their children without parting advice. No different for Yeoh: "The most recent thing she asked me to do is not wear pants at the Oscars.” 

Amanda Lee Myers contributed. 

All about the Oscars 

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