Things Clark Kellogg said during NCAA championship

Clark Kellogg, the wordy, loquacious, verbose CBS analyst was in top form Monday night for the national championship. Here's a breakdown of our favorite Kellogg-isms.

"They're playing on rollerblades here in Atlanta."

Apparently, they're also playing in 1994.

"You can't drive the car with the parking brake on."

Clark has obviously never driven with my mom.

[From under its own basket, Michigan throws inbound pass to half court.] "I hate this pass because of how it brings in to play the steal and the possibility for an easy score. It's a bailout. It's a lack of execution when you have to make that pass all the way in the backcourt and not get it inside in your forecourt."

Fifty-one words and 18 seconds to describe one shaky pass that did not result in a turnover. Shakespeare wrote "brevity is the soul of wit." Clark Kellogg must be more of a Christopher Marlowe man.

"It's a volcanic eruption of epic proportions."

Coincidentally, the shouty Kellogg said this at the same exact decibel level made by a volcanic eruption of epic proportions.

"Seeing it was absolutely beyond description."

More then 10 seconds later, Kellogg was finally finished with his description.

After a long Trey Burke three: "This is what we call 'in-the-gym range.' Get me in the building and I can spray you."

In my gym, that's not allowed.

"He is flowing like he's never flowed before."

Deleted scenes from the 8 Mile Blu-Ray or Clark Kellogg talking about Spike Albrecht?

"I can't remember but I will say this ..."

Even Kellogg's deficient power of recall can't prevent long-winded explanations.

"Can you say ABA shootout?"

"ABA shootout." Is that it? Am I supposed to yell it?

[After Tim Hardaway Jr.'s thunderous dunk.] "OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Yes, 63 H's. I counted. In Kellogg defense, the overemphasis in this case was totally warranted.