Michele Gorman: This is a call to arms …

Michele Gorman, author of The Curvy Girls Club, has a request for every time our inner critic raises her annoying little voice to slam our appearance: "… Tell her to sit down and shut up because we're too busy living and loving and laughing to let her ruin our day." Michele explains …

Michele: Imagine the scene at your first job interview: "Can you describe a situation when you overcame the bump in your nose?"

Or sitting quietly reminiscing with your daughter on the morning of her wedding: "Mom, tell me about the time you fit into a DD bra."

Or at your graveside: "What I most admired about her was the way she maintained her figure to the very end."

Far-fetched? Maybe, but why shouldn't others measure us by the size of our waistbands or the hook of our noses when we're doing the very same thing to ourselves? Study after study suggests that most of us think about our bodies all the time … and these aren't happy thoughts. Two-thirds of us worry about our appearance more than health, finances, relationships or professional success. About 76,000 surgical cosmetic procedures were carried out on U.S. teens in 2012. We tell ourselves we're not thin enough or toned enough or pretty enough or curvy enough. And what we hear is: We are not enough.

But I promise you that we are enough. We're the women who sit at the head of boardroom tables and raise the next generation of incredible people, we create the works of art that will become masterpieces and fight for our beliefs so that others can live better lives. We love and support and strive and win, we can dance in heels and make our own human beings. In big ways and small we're pretty fantastic when you think about it.

Do any of us choose our best friend based on her dress size or the regularity of her features? Do we tell her she's ugly, skinny, flabby or flat-chested? Or do we love her because she's honest, supportive, kind, funny, clever and loyal? If we wouldn't judge our friend, or daughter, or sister or mother by their muscle tone or overbite, why on earth should we measure our own self-worth that way?

So this is a call to arms … and legs and boobs and tummies and noses: Every time that mean little critic pipes up, tell her to sit down and shut up because we're too busy living and loving and laughing to let her ruin our day. She may not listen at first (she can be a stubborn bully and she's spoiled from getting her way for so long) but if you put her in her place often enough, eventually she'll slink away quietly.

That's what the characters in The Curvy Girls Club showed me. Without wishing to sound insane, my characters often surprise me, and some more than others. Katie, Ellie, Jane and Pixie taught me more than the characters in any of my other books. I learned so much, in fact, that I started the real Curvy Girls Club on Facebook and Twitter because I want a happy, fun, empowering place like this to exist in real life.

There's a scene in the book where one character's husband, gazing at his wife, says, "I wish she could see herself the way I see her. Is it an illness, do you think? She can't see how beautiful she is. She only sees flaws."

Ellie spoke up. "It's like there's a veil over you, and that's what your friends and family see. They're describing what they see through the veil. But you know what's beneath it. You can't believe that they won't see you without the veil one day. And then they'll be horrified."

The thing that I learned, though, is that we're the ones looking through the veil in the mirror, not them, and it's obscuring our vision, letting us see only an outline. But we are so much more than meets the eye. So take off the veil. Donate it to Goodwill, or better yet, burn it. Because nobody else wants those hand-me-downs.

Here's the blurb for The Curvy Girls Club:

Where Confidence is the New Black

When the pounds start falling off Katie, founder and president of London's most popular social club for the calorie-challenged, it seems like a dream come true. But as the overweight stigma recedes and her life starts to change, she faces losing more than the inches around her waist. Everything that's important to her – her closest friends, boyfriend, and acceptance into the club itself – are at stake in a world where thin is the new fat.

A funny, heart-warming story about overcoming the prejudices we hold, no matter where we tip the scales.

And do join the real Curvy Girls Club* on Facebook or Twitter (@CurvyGirlsClub3).

* It's not just for curvy girls, but for everyone who wants to feel great.

Find out more about Michele and her books at www.michelegorman.co.uk.