'Doctor Who,' what, where? Your dumb questions about the BBC show answered

Doctor Who is one of those shows that you either really get -- as in, you're obsessed, have a crocheted TARDIS on your desk and can rank the different Doctors on the basis of age, tenure on show, charisma and looks in a moment's notice -- or you just have no idea what's going on in the sci-fi BBC America series.

MORE: The definitive guide to watching Doctor Who

Here at Entertain This, we have people who fit squarely in those two categories: Kelly Lawler is the Whoxpert, while Carly Mallenbaum is the Whovice (Like "novice"? Just go with it.) So, in anticipation of tonight's season 9 premiere of the sci-fi cult hit, we had Carly watch an episode of the series, and then had Kelly answer her questions about it.

The episode Kelly picked for Carly to watch: Season 3: Episode 11, "Blink." Carly's questions are in bold, and Kelly's answers are below them.

Does the Doctor have a PhD, or is that just his nickname or something?

It's a name he picked for himself. We don't know what his real name is, and maybe never will (it has been 52 years, after all).

Do we actually called the Doctor "Doctor Who," or is that title of the show just silly, because no one knows who he is? Like a "Who's on first?" joke?

We call him "The Doctor." The title is exactly like a "who's on first" joke, but more British.

I think I get it: The Doctor is kinda like the guy from Time Traveler's Wife, where he doesn't have a linear life, and just randomly goes forward and backward in time?

Sort of, except that he can choose where he goes and when. He has a past and he has a future, but that is kind of irrelevant to the past and the future of the universe.

The time-traveling Doctor communicated from another decade via DVD and wallpaper in this episode. What other methods of communication through time does he utilize?

Lots. Or none. One time a friend of his communicates via museum artifact. Another time Vincent Van Gogh sends a message through a painting. Time travel is fun that way.

I know the police box is important. Why do people call that TARDIS?

TARDIS stands for "Time And Relative Dimension In Space." It is supposed to change it's outside depending on where in space in time it lands, but that circuit broke when the Doctor was in London in 1963, so for now until forever it looks like a 1960s British police phone box.

Why is the TARDIS so much bigger on the inside than it is on the outside?

Time Lord science. The TARDIS is also alive with a mind of her own, and sometimes takes the Doctor where he needs to go, rather than where he wants to go.

Does the TARDIS (I hope I'm referring to the right thing) just disappear whenever the Doctor wants it to? Does he control the TARDIS?

The Doctor flies the TARDIS, usually when he's inside it. In rare occasions (like the episode you saw), he can rig together some tech that lets him fly it remotely. It travels through space and time by disappearing in one place then reappearing in another.

I know there are other Doctors in different seasons. How does he change forms? Also, I think I like this one -- that's important, right? To have a favorite Doctor?

There have been 12 (technically 13) Doctors over the shows 52 year history. The creators of the show came up with a genius idea that whenever the Doctor "dies," instead of actually dying, he "regenerates" into a new body (i.e. a new actor can take over the part when one actor is done with it). You saw David Tennant (the 10th Doctor), who is one of the most popular Doctors of all time. Most fans have a favorite (I'm partial to Matt Smith's 11th Doctor) and will defend their pick vehemently.

Who is the chick with the Doctor?

The Doctor travels through time and space with one or more companions. Recently his companions have mostly been young, attractive women from the 21st century but he's traveled with married couples, aliens, people from the past and from the future. Occasionally he just finds people he likes to travel with but sometimes his companions have a bigger part to play.

Do the scary killer angel/alien/statues resurface?

Yup, and they're still pretty scary.

For more on Doctor Who basics and the upcoming season, listen to this week's episode of Paste BN's Mothership podcast.