A champion and his mom share a special bond

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PHOENIX -- Finding out she was pregnant at 16 was not a Hallmark-card Mother's Day moment.

Judy Robles, then Ochoa, was from a traditional Catholic family, and went to Catholic school. She could have given her baby up for adoption; her parents said the decision was hers to make. Judy never considered adoption; she wanted to keep her baby, though she knew the challenges would be big.

But when her son was born, she would face a challenge she never imagined. He had one leg.

"His other leg was perfect, his face (was perfect), just his other leg was gone," Robles remembered thinking as she cradled her son for the first time. "He was my baby."

Robles named him Anthony Marc: Anthony after her mom's favorite saint; Marc after her dad.

At 24, Anthony Marc Robles is known to the world as a three-time All-American wrestler, the 2011 Division I NCAA national champion and a member of the National Wrestling Hall of Fame. He tours as a motivational speaker, and in September published his autobiography, Unstoppable — From Underdog to Undefeated: How I Became a Champion (2012, Gotham, $25).

And at 41, Judy Robles is the mother of five children and is the director of parent and family engagement for Arizona State University's Preparatory Academy. Next year will be the first since Anthony was a toddler that she'll have only one at home.

Judy's story of motherhood is filled with details that are still painful for her to recall. But she hopes other families, other mothers, know there is always a chance to beat the odds.

'It was scary'

Judy met Anthony's biological father at a party during her junior year of high school. When a friend of Judy's told him Judy was pregnant, he wanted nothing to do with her or the baby.

Judy gave birth on July 20, 1988. Her parents were the ones who told her that he didn't have a right leg. Judy asked to see her son.

"It was scary," she said. "My parents were there for a little while and then they left and I got to be alone with him."

She counted fingers, toes, arms and a leg.

"I just remember opening his blanket and taking a look at him and then that was it," she said.

"I was like, 'OK. He's got one leg and let's just move forward with it. And he's cute. He's very, very cute.' "

Judy went back to school and back to having a social life.

"It was really hard because I was struggling trying to be a teenager and be a mom," she said.

Anthony was 8 months old when her parents sat her down for a loving but straight talk about her behavior and immaturity.

"They offered to raise Anthony as my little brother," she said.

"I had to make a choice," she said.

"Am I going to be a mom or am I going to try to live my own life?"

Judy believes in God. That choice was a divine moment, she said, when she realized, perhaps for the first time, that a mother will put a child's needs before her own.

"I remember sitting there being quiet and it was just going through my head that I was Anthony's mom and I needed to get it together and be there for him," she said. "On top of him having to grow up missing a leg, I didn't want him to grow up knowing that 'My mom gave me up to my grandparents.'

"I don't say it was overnight I was suddenly a great mom," she said.

"But I really worked hard, and Anthony and I were together always after that."

To Judy, her son was perfect. And she made sure he knew that.

"I told Anthony, 'I don't see you as disabled. I've never treated you that way. I see you as Anthony with a single leg.'

"There's a difference here because Anthony missing a leg is going to figure out how to go about life missing a leg.

"If I treat him as if he's disabled, I'm kind of making him lean on me, but I want him to be independent of me."

Struggling together

Judy was 18 and Anthony 2 when she met her future husband.

Judy says the relationship was troubled from the start. In his autobiography, Anthony writes about loving but seeking respect from his stepfather.

Judy married, hoping to build a family, and would become a mother four more times. First came two boys, Nicolas and Joshua, followed by a daughter, Ronnie. And then Andrew, who at 14 is still Judy's "baby."

Struggle was a part of their bond, Anthony said.

"While I was struggling, she was the one who'd make me feel positive about my challenges," he said.

"With my challenges of missing a leg and her challenges of being a (teen) parent and having a kid missing a leg, we were learning together and we were struggling together."

A broken spirit

Judy wanted a family – one family. She legally changed Anthony's last name to Robles when he was 11.

Still, "for the most part it was my mom raising me," Anthony said of the roles his mother filled in his life. "In a way she was my mom and dad. She had to teach me how to grow up and be a young man."

In high school, Anthony decided to dedicate himself to wrestling.

Anthony was a tough, bright kid, Judy said. But she believes his entry into wrestling taught him how to rise above failure.

His book tells of his sweat-dripping, back-breaking obsession to go from being a losing wrestler to a state high-school champion and a national collegiate champion.

But Anthony credits his mom, not his wrestling, for building his and his siblings' strength of character.

"She always taught us to strive for excellence," he said. "You never quit what you start.

"She had the nurturing role but also at the same time that role to push us, to make us go through those uncomfortable moments ... (that) in the long run would help us improve as human beings."

About five years ago, Judy's marriage fell apart for the last time. Judy says it was her lowest point as a mother.

She had no way to pay the mortgage on their house. She was selling her blood plasma to get money to feed her kids.

Judy's spirit was broken.

When Anthony came for a visit, he saw in person the pain that his mother would not share with him over the phone.

"The life was just sucked out of her," he said. "She wasn't happy. Her body was just shriveling up. ... It finally broke her back, she couldn't make it on her own."

Anthony told his mom that it was his turn to step up. He would quit wrestling and get a job.

And something in Judy as a mother — not a woman, not a wife, but a mother — snapped.

"I was seeing him stand up," she said. "I knew I had to stand up. I couldn't let him make that sacrifice."

The family would lose their longtime home, but Judy regained her spirit and began to thrive as a single mom.

And Anthony's senior year would be that of a champion.

A mom, always

Judy is rebuilding her life, her career and her self-confidence. She got her associate's degree in 2009 and is attending Arizona State University to get her bachelor's. She was recently promoted to her new position at ASU's Preparatory Academy.

All five of her children helped her move from Tempe, Ariz., to a house in Phoenix.

Anthony was fresh from a speaking tour. It was the first time she'd seen her boy in two weeks. Her hands went to his face, she kissed him hello — and then asked about his cough.

"I'm OK," Anthony said, smiling at his mom. He joined Nicolas, Joshua and Ronnie in lifting boxes into the moving truck. Andrew made sure their dog stayed out of the way.

They may be growing up. They are not outgrowing their mom.

"It's my job, even at 24 (with Anthony), I still can't stop being Mom," Judy said. "We're still close. (But) they're learning to live their own lives."

When Anthony was writing his book, he learned that his mom had always blamed herself for his having only one leg. But until now, he never knew why she felt that way.

Judy's voice was soft as she said she always wondered whether Anthony is paying for her mistakes. Perhaps if she hadn't been "young and stupid" and gotten pregnant as a teen, maybe Anthony would have been born with two legs.

But now it is Anthony who wants to make something clear: Whether with one leg or two, he would choose the same family. The same God-given path.

"Sure, we had some rough patches, and sure, certain things kind of sucked. It's made me who I am," he said.

And he would choose the same mom.

"If I had my choice," he said, "I would go through everything again."