Keeping it Together: America is obsessed with narcissists

The year was 2016. “Hamilton” had taken Broadway by storm, “Closer” by The Chainsmokers blared at parties across the nation, and nearly every media outlet seemed to ask a different version of the same question: Was Donald Trump, then a candidate for president, a narcissist?

“Is Donald Trump a textbook narcissist?” asked The Washington Post. “Is Donald Trump Actually a Narcissist? Therapists Weigh In!” added Vanity Fair. Others took a more definitive approach, like Harvard Business Review. “Why People Are Drawn to Narcissists Like Donald Trump,” the magazine wrote.

Hello! My name is Charlie, and this week I took a deep dive into America's narcissism obsession.

If you’ve been online, you’ve probably heard of narcissism − and, unless your social circle is extremely limited, you probably know a narcissist. That’s at least what Ramani Durvasula − an expert who's famous online as Dr. Ramani − told me when I interviewed her for the first time in 2021.

But if narcissists are indeed everywhere − and have been everywhere, long before Trump ran for office − why did I, and the rest of the world, catch on to them only in the past five to 10 years? How did the word “narcissist” − now lobbed at everyone from serial killers to presidential candidates to the guy who cut you off in traffic this morning − become the main topic of our culture’s entire conversation around relationships, dating and mental health? And is this obsession good for us?

I explore all these questions and more here, and you can find other insightful reads from our team below.