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Staying Apart, Together: Where did our motivation go?

Kelly Lawler   | Paste BN

As someone who writes for a living, I have to be creative and prolific on demand. And lately that's been more difficult than usual. 

Getting energized for work, for home duties, for distant or virtual socialization – it's extremely difficult for me right now, and (as I learned) for many of my loved ones. 

Last night I turned to social media for some help and advice about garnering motivation during the pandemic, and ended up learning that so many of my friends were similarly struggling. Instead of offering advice, many of them asked me to share what tips other people had. It was less an exchange of solutions than a collective sigh.  

I didn't get a miracle cure or life hack that can make me any more motivated to do housework, log into work every morning or finally set up the printer we ordered. But knowing that others living in a world full of seemingly unending sameness – staying home and worrying about the news – are also finding it hard to come up with their next brilliant idea helps just a little bit. 

Do you all have tips for finding motivation amid the pandemic? Laments of your own? Email stayingaparttogether@usatoday.com and I may include your responses in a future newsletter. 

Today's parenting struggle: Screen time

My colleague Brett Molina, a tech writer at Paste BN and one of my co-hosts on The Mothership podcast, wrote a really fantastic piece about kids, screen time and the pandemic. 

Brett, a parent himself, wrote about the desire to limit kids' screen time for their health while admitting the pandemic has forced much of their school and social lives online. 

He writes:

COVID-19 led to school closures, which also meant disrupting after-school activities including team sports. Quarantining pushed parents working remotely to relax screen time rules as they juggled their jobs and kids thrust into online schooling.

Now we’re approaching one year with quarantines and social distancing, with seemingly no end in sight. Does that mean rethinking how we approach screen time with our kids?

Dr. Pam Hurst-Della Pietra, the founder and president of Children and Screens: Institute of Digital Media and Child Development, says she has talked to several parents who “found it difficult to navigate screen time limits at a time when their children are no longer able to see friends and as online learning continues to become the new normal.” 

But it’s not just parents who want to dial back on screen time. It appears some kids are exhausted by them, too.

“There’s less and less for kids to do outside of screens and remote school, and a lot of kids are actually quite burned out on screens,” said Devorah Heitner, an expert on young people’s use of technology and author of “Screenwise: Helping Kids Thrive (and Survive) In Their Digital World.”

Experts laid out this advice for parents:

  • Think analog. Heitner suggests ditching devices for something more analog, like a physical book, puzzles and board games.
  • Create some new routines. Before turning to screens, make sure kids are getting essential activities done like finishing homework or doing regular exercise. 
  • Take those devices at night. This feels obvious, but don’t let their screen time affect their health, especially sleep. 
  • Lead by example. Any analog activities don’t have to be just for kids. Turning things like craft time or board game night into a family event can help. 

And remember, this isn't about the blame game if your kids are spending a lot of time staring at screens. Hurst Della-Pietra advises parents not to be so hard on themselves.

“There is a silver lining in some of this,” she said. “Kids have learned some new skills and new apps and new programs, and they are finding ways to be creative and to connect.”

Read Brett's full story here, and if you have your own experiences, strategies or stories, you can fill out our survey or reach out to Brett Twitter: @brettmolina23.

Today's reads

Today's pet

"This is Bella, on a walk with me and after our walk," says her human Karen Rawlings, of snowy Wayland, Michigan. "She looks so cute when she's napping. I'd love to nap with her, but we humans have things we have to do...well maybe those things can wait till tomorrow, I'm not going anywhere...y-a-w-n."

I too would like to spend my days napping with a pooch. How do I apply for that job?

That's all for this Tuesday, my friends. Stay safe, stay well. I'll be back in your inboxes on Saturday. Remember you can email stayingaparttogether@usatoday.com with pet pictures, coping tips and more. I love to hear from you. 

All my very best,

Kelly Lawler

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