How to break cycle of fear driven by COVID and war. And protect your kids' mental health.

Two years after the World Health Organization declared COVID-19 a pandemic, a new Harris Poll conducted on behalf of the American Psychological Association found that 63% of American adults said their lives have been forever changed. Loss of life, economic hardship and cultural changes have been pervasive.

The survey revealed widespread grief and worry about children’s development. Almost half of those surveyed reported a big increase in sedentary behavior, which will be difficult to reverse, and a majority revealed significant unwanted weight changes. Drinking and substance abuse have been on the rise because of the stress of the pandemic and its restrictions.

And just when it appeared that stress and fear were finally giving way to a feeling of liberation as the number of cases and hospitalizations and associated mandates from COVID dropped dramatically, along came the war in Ukraine.

The Harris Poll showed a high level of stress over the sudden rise in the price of gas and other essential items, the war and potential retaliation from Russia, including fear of nuclear weapons.

No reprieve from intense stress 

Stress is not limited to one risk or another; it accumulates. What was pandemic worry carries over into worry over the war. We have not been given a reprieve as images of unhappy masked children have changed to images of bombed hospitals and displaced children. More adults rate inflation and issues related to the invasion of Ukraine as stressors than any other issue asked about in the 15-year history of the “Stress in America” Harris poll. 

The amygdala is an almond-shaped organ deep in the center of the brain. Once stimulated by either actual events or video images, it initiates a firing of neurochemicals (epinephrine, norepinephrine, cortisol) that are intended to bring us to a state of readiness.

But if there is no one to fight and nowhere to run to, we simply implode, as our heart rate and blood pressure rise without a targeted end point. This worry cycles and interferes with our sleep and our ability to function. It interferes with our immune system and increases our risk of disease.

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Dr. Elizabeth Phelps has conducted seminal research on how our brains respond to fear and how fear memories are formed. She has discovered that memories of fear could be rewritten or blocked early, opening the door for valuable new therapies.

Avoiding cycles of worry 

The treatment for a cycle of worry is to replace these negative emotions and obsessions coursing through our brains with more positive ones like courage and love.

Compassion for the people of Ukraine can take the place of fear for ourselves. Projected courage will help our children cope as they look to us for answers.

Of course, stress is often unrecognized, invisible, as its effect builds in our brains and bodies unchecked.

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Healthy diversionary activities include exercise, meditation, prayer and limiting exposure to the images of war on television, the internet and social media. Unfortunately, these horrific images keep coming back as the war continues to rage out of control.

I can’t help but think, on the second anniversary of COVID-19 being called a pandemic, that we didn’t do ourselves a favor by sounding so many alarms in the public health world. The fear pump in our brains was primed to erupt when the war and its associated economic devastation hit.

When your children ask about the war in Ukraine, it is important to avoid replacing one cycle of worry with another.

Dr. Marc Siegel, a member of Paste BN's Board of Contributors and a Fox News medical correspondent, is a professor of medicine and medical director of Doctor Radio at NYU Langone Health. His latest book is "COVID: the Politics of Fear and the Power of Science."  Follow him on Twitter: @DrMarcSiegel