Black boys need help coping with trauma. You could be their next mentor. | Opinion
Many of these boys act out because they are in pain, and if that pain is not addressed, these young men will be robbed of their ability to grow into roles as community leaders.
Rubie Mizell will tell you that she is the mother of many sons in her job as parent coordinator at Roosevelt Creative Arts Middle School. She’s watched many boys fall into the wrong group of friends and get caught up in risky behaviors like stealing cars or face hardships from parents who physically or verbally abuse them.
Despite these challenges, Mizell said, Black boys in Milwaukee have a purpose and all have the potential to become great leaders and community members. The key is having them believe in themselves – and that’s where mentors like community activist Kwabena Antoine Nixon come in.
Mizell was moved to tears as she listened to her students share their struggles during a recent group session led by Nixon. As the boys sat in a semicircle, he clarified that he wasn’t there to deliver a typical “say no to drugs” speech or bombard them with familiar messages about avoiding trouble on the streets or staying in school.
Instead, he referred to the young men as "kings" and told them they were free to leave if he didn’t have their attention within three minutes.
After he shared his story of growing up in Chicago, losing his father at the age of 11 and having a mother addicted to drugs, the boys listened intently to every word.
All stayed.
You could have called it a tears-and-truth summit, because hard truths were told, tears were shed and if anyone is paying attention, the path to these young men becoming leaders and not bleak statistics was evident. The brass at MPS should take a lesson or two from what I witnessed at the Roosevelt library on a recent Wednesday.
Exercise asked middle schoolers to write, 'The truth is ...'
Nixon then asked the boys to write their thoughts in a notebook for an assignment titled “The truth is.”
He instructed them to answer from their hearts and not from their heads. Most filled out a page, a few cried and some shared their challenges with the group. Here is a sampling of what they wrote:
“The truth Is, I’m a good kid, even though most people don’t see it.”
“The truth is, I act out because I don’t want my parents to get a divorce.”
“The truth is, I wish my dad weren’t locked up.”
“The truth is that I wish I had a positive role model to talk to.”
“Truth is, I want to be a lawyer one day, but I don’t know any."
“The truth is my brother was killed this year, and I miss him every day.”
“The truth is if I died, I don’t think anyone would care.”
Mentor shares life lessons, not lectures, and gets students to open up
Mizell reached out to Nixon and asked him to come to Roosevelt after multiple incidents involving students at the school and within the community. Two “Kia Boys” were injured after crashing a stolen car and several have been involved in fights, been disruptive in class, and disrespected teachers and staff.
Over the past year, I've been writing about the disturbing nature of crimes committed by younger and younger youths in the city and the failure of Milwaukee Public Schools to earn the trust of the community despite the passage of a referendum that will deliver millions of new tax dollars to the school system. Yet I'm not giving up on these kids or MPS. I believe the solution is to get inside classrooms and community centers with mentors like Nixon and listen to what they say and do.
When the boys walk into the school library to meet Nixon, he firmly shakes the hands of everyone who comes in. He tells them that by the end of the session, if they participate, they probably will be emotional or cry.
Nixon didn’t give a stay-in-school speech, he delivered a life lesson they needed to hear, "What I say to you, I’m hoping you get. Unfortunately, I give my message in several places, high school graduations, college campuses and funerals.”
Nixon told the boys that after speaking at one high school, he received a call from the mother of a kid named Curtis, who was shot and killed. His mother wanted to know if Nixon would speak at her son’s funeral. He then described in some detail what a mom goes through burying her son, including pulling out all of Curtis’ pictures and trophies and talking about how he was a good kid and how he fell in with the wrong crowd.
As some of the Roosevelt middle schoolers looked down, Nixon demanded that they look at him: “This ain’t school today; this is a life class. We go to Miss Pitt's funeral home, and she picks out a casket by herself because Curtis’ dad is not around."
He said Curtis’ mom didn’t have enough money for the funeral, so Nixon said he had to call men from the community to chip in: “It costs $7,500 to bury you. She told me, Mr. Nixon, it took me nine months to bring my child to life, and it took someone 30 seconds and 30 shots to take his life."
Nixon told the boys that’s his work, but he would rather be at their graduation hearing them say, "Mr. Nixon told me something to help me change my life."
Some of the boys paid close attention and understood his message, while others in the group of 20 seemed indifferent. He went to to explain that their choices in life are their own to make and then knelt on the floor in front of a blue bag and poured out its contents, which included items related to the 50 funerals of loved ones he had lost, including the obituary of his father.
“I’m 55 years old, and I’ve been burying people since I was 11 years old, but I bet you I’m not by myself because when I go around this room, I guarantee some of your hands will get raised,” he said.
Trauma common denominator among Black boys at the school
Roosevelt School serves 300 students in grades six to eight. Based on overall test scores in math and reading proficiency, it ranks in the bottom 50% of all schools in Wisconsin.
Last month, Milwaukee Public Schools announced it would evaluate Roosevelt as it decides which schools to close and merge due to declining enrollment.
According to the National Center for Education Statistics and the Wisconsin Department of Public Instruction, the percentage of Roosevelt middle school students achieving proficiency in math is 1%, which is significantly lower than the state average of 39%. The percentage of students achieving proficiency in reading is 3%, compared with the state average of 38%.
Nixon acknowledged the negative statistics. "They say this is one of the worst schools in the city, and that's why I'm here. I want you to prove them wrong,” he said.
As Nixon conducted another exercise, it became clear why many students struggled academically. He asked the group to raise their hands if they had been impacted by violence in the following ways:
"Raise your hand if you have lost a friend or family member to violence."
Every hand went up, including those of the staff in the room.
"Raise your hand if you have lost two friends or family members to violence."
Once again, every hand went up.
"I hate to ask this, but raise your hand if you have lost three or more friends or family members to violence."
Fifteen out of the 20 hands went up. The boys reported losing their mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, cousins and best friends to gun violence.
As MPS faces critical choices, mental health must be at top of list
If a child loses a mom to gun violence, how can you expect him to ace an algebra test or focus on a science project, especially if he doesn't have access to counseling or a support system at home?
“I know they are hurting because they tell me what they are going through. I love them so much and consider them my babies,” Mizell said.
The boys confide in her and see her as a safe space to discuss their challenges. At the end of the meeting, Nixon called Mizell to the middle of the room, and he told the boys how much she cared for them and that her greatest fear was that they didn’t know their real potential.
Mizell broke down crying, as did many of the boys.
So many tears and truths, including this: If we want to improve test scores and stop reading about middle schoolers shooting their friends, we must take a more proactive approach, one that treats their trauma and improves their mental health.
MPS must make sure every school has at least two mental wellness coaches, one for boys and one for girls. Taxpayers passed a $252 million referendum in April. The district says the money was needed to help students succeed in school and life.
If that’s the case, it must invest in mental health counselors and safe space sessions at every school. The truth is, regardless of what happens to the Roosevelt Middle School building, students who have experienced trauma need someone to talk to in order to heal.
While mentors can offer support, they cannot do it alone. Many of these boys act out because they are in pain, and if that pain is not addressed, no one in Milwaukee is safe and these young men will be robbed of their ability to grow into roles as community leaders and not community statistics.
James E. Causey is an Ideas Lab reporter at the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, where this column originally appeared. You can reach him at jcausey@jrn.com or follow him on X: @jecausey