Digital Life: New rules for Facebook sharing

Paste BN columnist Steven Petrow offers advice about digital etiquette.

Q: I'm a news junkie, and I frequently post links on Facebook to articles and videos I find interesting. Many of them are from pretty arcane news sites, so I enjoy spreading their offbeat points of view. Problem is, one of my Facebook "friends" likes to post the same links I do, but she doesn't use the "share" button, she just posts them again as if she'd found them on her own. I know she never visits these sites, she's just pretending she does to seem more interesting. Can I tell her to knock it off?

-- Anonymous

A: Are you suggesting that your friend be prosecuted for Facebook plagiarism? Methinks so — but instead of getting your knickers in a twist, remember this aphorism -- "Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery."

Backing up for a moment: When a friend reads a item that she wants to repost, she'll click on "Share" and it will appear in her newsfeed with this pithy phrase: "via your friend's name" (although she has the option to remove the attribution). I suggest leaving a friend's name on as a courtesy -- and as a way to let others know how you found your post -- but it's certainly not mandatory. After all, it's not like she plagiarized your long lost novel without your knowledge. Another way to give credit when credit is due is to use the acronym "H/T," which stands for "hat tip" (as in, a tip of the hat). According to Urban Dictionary, a Hat Tip is: "Frequently used in blog postings to indicate the gratitude of the poster towards someone who drew his attention to or provided him with information relevant to the post."

After your written post, just add in "H/T your friend's name." Be sure to use the @ sign before your friend's name to hyperlink it.

Your friend may indeed need a reminder that social networks are about being social as well as sharing. Since your friend clearly appreciates your frequent postings, I suggest you send a private message that reads something like this: "I'm glad to see that you enjoy reposting many of my Facebook updates. I hope your friends like them, too."

This approach may be slightly passive-aggressive, but it's better than aggressive-aggressive and it will put your friend on notice that you're watching. Then, to paraphrase a Buddhist saying: Let go, otherwise you'll be dragged down.

Agree or disagree with my advice? Let me know in the comment section.

Submit your question to Steven at stevenpetrow@earthlink.net. You can also follow Steven on Twitter: @StevenPetrow. Or like him on Facebook at facebook.com/stevenpetrow.